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Archive for June, 2025

Why Did God Allow This Cancerous Tumor In My Brain?

Long story short 

 On April 15, 2025 my tennis partner, who is a Doctor, sensed I was off. (More than usual). I typically walk home after the match, but he insisted in driving me home and that I see my regular Doctor. I am so thankful for his urging. I saw my Doctor a day or two later and an MRI was scheduled. Within hours I got a call that I had a tumor in my brain. I had very few symptoms before except minor headaches that I thought nothing of. I was ready to play a third set of tennis that day but my buddies said no. Guess I was acting off/weird. Within days of the MRI, I was scheduled for brain surgery to remove the tumor (April 21). I spent those few days preparing my family, not knowing if I would make it out of the surgery alive or have motor skills severely damaged. Things went very well in terms of the tumor being removed (cancer still remains), The tumor was a severe cancer type.  So, I begin chemo/radiation treatment shortly after for 6 weeks. I’m in my last week of 6 weeks of treatment. 

No, God didn’t CAUSE my tumor! 

I hope no one thinks God caused this tumor to teach me a lesson for my sins. I ain’t no saint but I’m kinder than most folks. I have friends who will verify. I know some selfish/evil people that are cancer free. I refuse to believe a loving God using tragedies to punish or teach one a lesson and we remain clueless reasons for such actions. Besides, that assumes God is simply pulling strings to control events in the world. Did God cause this for a greater good. I doubt it. God can’t control how I will react to a tragedy in my life. I could be pissed at God and no good comes of it. Some claim all evil eventually leads to good as if some grand plan by God. Not my God! Ask sexual abuse victims or family members of murdered loved ones if good always comes out of evil.

Or it is claimed we sinners have no right to question a Holy God. I have a God I can doubt, question, get angry with, whatever. That is what a loving parent/God is like. How do I know this? I have been a child of a parent and a parent of children. Why would a Creator create us to have intuitions of what true love is (allowing a child to question) but not be loving themself?

See Does God Really Punish Or We Just Reap What We Sow? Assuming God is in control of punishment makes a mockery of freedom. It is an oxymoron to claim God in in complete control and we human have freedom. If God does actively punish and carry out wrath, God is letting a whole lot of evil in the world slide. God doesn’t love more those spared than those supposedly punished.

Does God Really Allow Cancer?

It is claimed a mystery how God can allow evil but not be evil. Humans don’t get a free pass if they can stop evil but don’t. Ask sexual abuse victims when their parent knew and did nothing. One might ask why God allows such harm if supposedly all-powerful. Thinking God is all-powerful (thus all-controlling) assumes God can pull strings to make certain things happen (allow). So much for genuine freedom?  See God Can’t Stop Your Suffering And Evil!

Thankfully, I don’t entertain such a view of God which has helped having a positive view during all this, though I have many miles to travel in my journey. My silent friend (God), along with family and friends have been a life-saver. You have a lot of internal conversations when waiting for brain surgery or going through cancer. When one believes “God allows” your mind can wander. Why me and not others (is God’s love arbitrary – if God can supposedly control everything), what lesson is God trying to teach me. I never had to go there. I am convinced God isn’t all-powerful.

If we maintain that God limits their Power, this suggests God can do something but doesn’t. We must come up with a better explanation that God simply allows – thus controls – evils but isn’t responsible for such evils. A God who can prevent evil but doesn’t is counter-intuitive to love. No loving parent or God sits idly by when they could prevent tragedies such as rape or murder. Are we to believe God doesn’t care, God is punishing us, or God has abandoned us and left us clueless about the grand plan? God doesn’t just allow your suffering!  

God may not be all powerful 

It is only natural to believe a Supreme Being, if they exist, is all powerful. Most Christians believe this because of their understanding of the Bible taught in churches they attend but questions arise if God is all-powerful. If God can control everything, why doesn’t God intervene more in medical emergencies, rape, physical abuse, etc. A miracle supposedly saved Trump but not the gentlemen in the front row. I doubt it. God doesn’t pick and choose when to cause or allow suffering.  

God can’t be all-powerful if all-loving. Perfect love isn’t controlling. Ask any adult child with a controlling parent. Thomas Oord in his new book defends ably that the Bible doesn’t necessarily claim God is all-powerful and can do anything. See here. God can’t tempt others (Jas. 1:13). It makes no sense to say God can exert all power and creatures can exert some power. I have never understood why God doesn’t stop evil if God can do anything.  If “everything happens for a reason” because of God, this would make God responsible for all goodness and all evil. It is claimed a mystery how God can cause or allow evil but not be evil. This isn’t true for humans. Some claim all evil eventually leads to good as if some grand plan by God. Hardly! 

What about prayer and miracles? 

Many prayers asking for healing are obviously not answered. Are miracles arbitrary – God picking and choosing to bless some and not others? Conditions in our body may not always be right. Various biological and environmental factors are involved such as cells, organs, etc. If God wouldn’t take away your human freedom, it may not be a stretch to say God has to account for natural freedom as well. Miracles can happen when God’s uncontrolling love aligns with countless factors known and not known. God surely intervenes when circumstances will allow. Pray if you like, but God is already working to do all God can to prevent suffering. That’s what perfect Love does! See  Why God Doesn’t Answer My Prayers?

I am convinced God is always seeking to intervene when possible.  Pray for miracles, but don’t assume God can answer our prayers but doesn’t for some unknown reason. God suffers with us, but the unfortunate truth in a free world is suffering happens, though God is dying to help. We can pray but be more understanding when God can’t answer our prayers. Pray to God for emotional support and encouragement in difficult times. My silent Friend has gotten me through some difficult times when my brain begins to wander.

Did God really choose the Holocast by not responding, including senseless suffering to children in the world?

Do you read the Bible Edwards?

I believe we should assume the Bible isn’t inspired by God. We can’t prove the Bible is or isn’t inspired by God. Besides, the Bible is literature that requires interpretation and we don’t all agree on the correct interpretation even concerning moral issues such as if God condemns gays or not. Many assume inspiration means God approved or controlled all recorded by the writers, especially characterizations of God. Many don’t think of inspiration as meaning that God encouraged or motivated writers/editors to record their understanding of God, thus possible being right or wrong.

See here all my rants on the Bible and why we need to rethink our understanding of the Bible. 

So, what good is God? 

The only God worth believing in or having a relationship with must be a perfect Lover. God can’t be all-powerful or controlling and be true to God’s nature. Thomas Jay Oord in his books says that so many positive elements can come from affirming a universal, divine Lover. Such a Spirit empowers, inspires, and accompanies us in our relationships with others. God knows and empathizes with us in our suffering. This is what I have experienced. God obviously grieves due to all the evil in the world. God suffered when Jesus was crucified. God suggested through Jesus’ example and words what kind of life lived here on earth can make for a much grander world. My relationship with God, though a silent friend, has carried me so far. 

My future 

I thought initially that surgery and removing the tumor out of my brain was my greatest danger, when discovered I had a tumor. Thus, why I tried to prepare the family and get financial house in order, as I thought I might not be back. Turns out most don’t die on the surgery table. Motor and physical skills can be damaged, which I didn’t realize as much, but I had a great surgeon. I was only in hospital two days after brain surgery, had brain fog for a week (you had to have 5 PHDs to understand my texts), but I felt pretty good after a week. It does help to be retired.  I began radiation and chemo therapy for 6 weeks. So far, no nausea, I can handle the tiredness because I was very active before tumor. I get tired – I get moving. Sitting makes me more tired. My stamina affected but I can change some of my habits to hopefully see my grandchildren become teenagers. I am a cool POPS. I didn’t have a relationship with my grandparents, so I want to get it right as I did as a parent when I had children.   

I am walking on the average 2-3 miles a day. Playing tennis two days a week. But, 5 weeks of great fortune with treatment doesn’t guarantee the next week of treatment and thereafter. And it takes some weeks after treatment to recover from tiredness, etc. So the journey ain’t over! I will have an MRI August 6th, a month after treatment to see how much treatment was successful with the cancer. Even if very successful I may be prone to seizers and other medical matters down the road. I could live a year but some with my type of cancer live 10 years or more. We will see. Thank God for God, family, and my friends. Peace!

Click on FOLLOW button on this page to enter email address to be notified of future Posts. No other unrelated emails will be sent. Go to About/Using This Site tab at top of page or Menu on phones to help navigate this Site. I also blog at http://donewithreligion.com If you wish to discuss anything I have written, you can email me at medwar2@gmail.com

  

 

 

 

God Doesn’t Mind Skeptics!

I would suggest you are better off doubting what you have been told and verify it for yourself. It isn’t easy in the land of uncertainty but it can save you from regretful decisions in the arenas of religion, science, and politics. Being a skeptic isn’t being disrespectful. Children will often claim “I didn’t do it.” You still love them but still seek to confirm they are telling the truth. A marriage may be different as such a relationship has built up trust, but we certainly can question our partner’s opinions as we all need to think for ourselves. 

Spiritual Authorities

Too much trust is given to pastors and other religious leaders without questioning their opinions. Run from leaders who are afraid or unwilling to defend or discuss their opinions. Many will proclaim “the Bible say” without acknowledging many don’t agree with their interpretation. Scholars do not agree on many moral issues. I was told often that the Bible teaches there is a literal hell where unbelievers in the afterlife or tortured with fire forever after a few short years living here on planet earth. 12 Reasons To Believe Hell Is A Myth! This impacted my view of God and caused regrets in my relationships. I felt obligated to evangelize them out of hell. I wish I had challenged many views of God that went against my moral intuitions. Moral of story – don’t believe everything you hear claimed about God! See here.

Science experts

Many readers have begun to question their spiritual leadership. Lessons learned – we should question authorities in all areas of our life in case they are wrong. Because of my early religious experiences and contrarian personality – I knew to question experts who said to trust them without debate. It has been declared in the past that the Covid vaccines prevented infection and transmission of the disease. That was the purpose of mandates. Scientists and doctors who declared otherwise were censored, but it turns out that weren’t the mis-informers.

Those who claimed masks didn’t prevent the spread of a virus were called mis-informers. Turns out a review that dug into findings of 78 randomized controlled trials discovered wearing masks made little or no difference in stopping the virus. See here.  Lots of my friends who wore masks got Covid. For those curious, it is claimed by many masks can even be harmful to the virus getting inside the mask and staying on the masks thus breathing it in. “Undebated/censored science” isn’t science. We must make decisions for ourselves in case so-called experts are wrong.

Politicians

We often don’t change our mind because we make decisions based on our feelings than cognitions. Should we make buying decisions based on if we want it as opposed to whether we can afford it? Should we date or marry someone based only on feelings or based on their actions? In our recent election, many voted based on their feelings about a particular candidate. Without specific evidence one is Hitler incarnated or a Communist. I am convinced a wiser choice is to vote based on policies/cognitions that I believe best for the future of my children, grandchildren, and country. Climate alarmists have warned of the world coming to an end in the past. We still live on.  Ignore those unwilling to debate. Question every idea and decide for yourself after looking at both views.

Certainty or uncertainty?

One may believe what seems to be the popular narrative, without exploration, to avoid anxiety not knowing. Disagreeing with the popular science narrative or church leadership about God’s character can lead to isolation. The truth is certainty is an illusion unless talking about universal moral sins such as rape or incest. Adultery isn’t only wrong in the eyes of the betrayer. Assume uncertainty if you have one rational friend who believes differently from you whether it’s about religion, science, or politics. It should be intuitive those who reject diverse opinions is unloving and controlling. Most don’t except such behaviors in their personal relationships.

Having good intentions by believing you are right for the whole doesn’t matter if you could be wrong. Religious leaders seem hell-bent in telling people what they must believe about God according to their understanding and interpretation of the Bible. Scientists or Politicians who refuse debate of their policies are no different. Leaders play God (Superior) in the lives of others by claiming to know the truth and we can’t decide for ourselves.

I have a hunch God especially loves skeptics!

Most agree an unloving or tyrannical God isn’t worth believe in. It is only intuitive, if a Creator exist, that a Creator loves the ways their creations ought to love one another. A parent obviously loves a child who finds it easier than their others children to accept them and their ways. But we don’t unlove our skeptical children. A greater pain may be when our children ignore us. Spiritual or human parents don’t desire forced love, which isn’t genuine, but hope for consideration and to prove the possibility of a better relationship. Be a free thinker and resist those who resist!

Click on FOLLOW button on this page to enter email address to be notified of future Posts. No other unrelated emails will be sent. Go to About/Using This Site tab at top of page or Menu on phones to help navigate this Site. I also blog at http://donewithreligion.com If you wish to discuss anything I have written, you can email me at medwar2@gmail.com  

What Is God’s Love Really Like?

I write a lot about this topic as I named my blog over 15 years ago  What God May Really Be Like  I used the word “May” because I was countering dogmatism growing up in church. Who knows what God is really like unless God talks to you directly? Be humble. But, if you are told something about God that goes against your moral intuitions, question it. Most accept God is love.

How do we best determine what God love like 

There is a problem claiming the Bible is the definitively word on what God’s love is like. Ancient literature is subject to interpretation. Even if the writers understood their God perfectly, which we can’t prove, we can’t claim our interpretations are perfect. The truth is biblical scholars who have a deep respect for the Bible don’t agree what God thinks about gays, women, hell, and other moral issues. See here. See here. See here.  Gays are supposedly condemned, women’s leadership roles are limited, despite their gifts and a fiery torturous afterlife awaits infidels – all in God’s name!

Why wouldn’t God be most like what our moral intuitions suggest. Our inborn sense of good and evil, not an ancient Book, tells us sexual abuse or murder is immoral. If a Creator exists, it is only intuitive that a Creator loves the ways their creations ought to love one another. We all seem to know the question we ought to ask ourselves – am I loving others perfectly? Or am I loving others like I want to be loved. Many times, when one believes contrary to universal moral intuitions (infidels should be destroyed in this life), it is because of their interpretation of a supposed inspired Book by their God.

Surely, perfect human love is the same as Godly love

The only God worth believing in must be perfectly loving as opposed to in any way hateful. God’s love surely is the same as supreme parents – other-directed not self-consumed. Love gets excited when we do well and make a difference in the lives of others. Love anticipates, hopes for my success, believes in me, pulls for me even when failing, because I do the same for my children. We doubt God but God still loves. Parents bring children into the world hoping their children freely reciprocate their love for authentic relationships. Why would God be any different.

How you imagine God’s love can determine how you relate to others

  • If we think God is hard to please and pissed off about sin rather than what sin is doing to us, we may judge others just as harshly rather than showing patience and mercy
  • If God is really a warlike God according to the OT, we will use such behaviors to possibly justify going to war when we shouldn’t
  • If God condemns gays, we will condemn gays out of devotion to God
  • If God thinks men have authority over women in some positions, that will filter down to your wives, daughters, and friends and stifle their gifts
  • If God can prevent evil and doesn’t, isn’t that like a parent who arbitrarily decides to watch their child being sexually abused or not? Maybe God can’t love perfectly by controlling freedom. God can only stop evil with the help of others or not create freedom!

I’m convinced belief in a benevolent God, according to common moral intuitions, makes you kinder. We often treat others the way we think God treats us.  How has God’s threats of punishment helped you break away from bad habits or behaviors you long to change? I guess fear God if helps to avoid consequences of destructive actions. But if struggling and need encouragement and mercy, a loving God awaits with open arms. Grace or authoritativeness doesn’t guarantee change, but I believe we best change because of a friend’s or God’s love and acceptance. See It Matters If Your God Is Nurturing Or Authoritative!

Click on FOLLOW button on this page to enter email address to be notified of future Posts. No other unrelated emails will be sent. Go to About/Using This Site tab at top of page or Menu on phones to help navigate this Site. I also blog at http://donewithreligion.com If you wish to discuss anything I have written, you can email me at medwar2@gmail.com  

God Must Be Perfectly Good Humanly Speaking Or Not Worth Believing In!

It takes faith to believe God exists since there is no visible evidence, but surely most assume any God worth believing in must be perfectly morally good. Dennis Prager argues according to the contemporaneous ancient Near East Babylonian story, the gods destroyed humanity because humans made so much noise keeping the gods awake. I couldn’t believe in such a God because of my understanding of genuine love required by a loving God.

God must be good intuitively! 

If there is a God, they must be perfectly loving. Many of us left organized religion, not God, because claims about God’s character was contrary to our deepest moral intuitions. It doesn’t make sense why a Creator wouldn’t love the same way we humans believe we were seemingly created by a supposed Creator to love (aka goodness). Even those who try to defend God’s violent ways in the Bible agree, or they wouldn’t attempt to rationalize why a supposed inspired/infallible Book by God reports bad actions contributed to God. We can’t always understand what perfect love is – to help a drug addict or let them hit bottom – but even the Bible assume we can understand God’s perfect love through human lens – “be perfect, as your heavenly God is perfect.” (Mt 5:48).

God can only be understood through “goodness” lens anyway

If God is bad or evil at times, we can only understand such actions by comparing/exploring what is good. If God was supposedly unloving, we can only pursue such knowledge by discussing what true love it. It seems we can only rely on human reasoning what is good or common moral sense whether interpreting a Book, judging one’s actions toward others, or understanding what God’s love is like. We know God’s goodness by assuming not bad! 

How do we know what “good” is? 

Parents create/have children to be loved and teach how to love others. An existing Creator surely creates desiring to love and hopes we love others as parents should love their children. We all seem to know the question we ought to ask ourselves – am I loving others perfectly? Self-evident morals aren’t hidden in any Holy Book. We all have an inborn sense of good and evil. We may not always be certain the most loving action, unless my son or son-in laws mistreat women!  There is a reason anyone who justifies selfishness is often friendless.  

Why do some argue perfect human and Godly love aren’t always the same?

The Bible doesn’t always describe God in perfect human moral terms, so may God-believers resort to suggesting God’s actions are sometimes a mystery. Believers assume God must be perfectly good so rationalizations are made. See 9 Reasons To Not Trust The Bible’s Claims About God! Many assume that the entire Bible is approved/inspired by God, so they must explain why the Bible reports God acting violently or destructively. But a Book can’t be the definitive word about God since subject to different interpretations, and we can’t prove God always controlled what the writers understood and wrote about God.

So What….If God Is Good Or Not? 

Why believe in or desire to have a relationship with a God you can’t respect or attempt to understand? Many may reject or resist God if perceived as authoritative versus nurturing. See here. As stated, many of us left the institutional church because leaders kept insisting characteristics of God, according to the Bible, were contrary to our moral sense. Others inclined to believe in God may hesitate because of what God is described by Christians as supposedly being like. God doesn’t send people to a torturous afterlife for choices made briefly here on earth. The majority of people end up believing in the religion, whether Christian, Buddhist, or Muslim, where born. God isn’t a God of chance! God likely gives all a chance now or after death to believe or not. God is exactly who you imagine a loving God is like – unless you’re a selfish human being.  Then, good luck having genuine friendships!

Click on FOLLOW button on this page to enter email address to be notified of future Posts. No other unrelated emails will be sent. Go to About/Using This Site tab at top of page or Menu on phones to help navigate this Site. I also blog at http://donewithreligion.com If you wish to discuss anything I have written, you can email me at medwar2@gmail.com